The Pathway Back

After posting "A Broken Vessel," I was pretty well spent. I was unsure how I would recover from all that had happened the previous week. I could not formulate a plan in my head and was not just real impressed with where God's plan had me. That Sunday morning it became evident that even though I was not particularly interested in spending time with God, He still wanted to spend time with me.

After waking up Sunday morning, I turned on the TV and, out of habit, started looking for Dr. Charles Stanley. After flipping through a few channels, I found him and was shocked to see that his message that day was about challenges to our faith. When he said that all of us face failures in our faith sometimes, I about yelled, "Preach on, Brother!" He went on to make the point that God uses these tests as a means to increase and stretch our faith. I began to realize that I was being stretched, and it was not very comfortable.

After watching Dr. Stanley, I flipped a few more channels and heard another familiar voice. I had stumbled onto Dr. David Jeremiah's broadcast. His message that day was on fighting discouragement. Really? In the course of his message, he said that all Christians will become discouraged. The only way to overcome deep discouragement is to read the Bible, but sometimes you will be so discouraged that you will have to force feed yourself. He said that you will have to pray that God give you verses of encouragement and that He sends you some encouragers.

So, on Sunday afternoon, I humbled myself and asked God to forgive me for my bad attitude, that He give me some verses of encouragement, and send people to encourage me. When I opened my Bible, God provided verses that once again established that He was, is, and will forever be in control. He knows my situation better than I do and that I have to trust His direction.

Sunday evening, my phone rang, and it was my sister calling to encourage me and lift my spirits. Then I started receiving e-mails and comments on my blog. People started thanking me for being honest about my battle and telling me that they would be praying for me. Then on Tuesday morning, a woman that I have never met left me a comment about how my latest blog entry had helped her and her mother understand what another family member was going through. Even in my brokenness, God was still building.

These last two weeks I have still had to force feed myself some days. But at least I know I am now on the pathway back. The pathway has been largely uphill, and there was one more battle I would have to fight. I'll save that for the next post.